Oh, the possibilities of accomplishment in the extra hours of house arrest, due to COVID-19…or so it seems.
I thought for sure I would be further along in my new book draft. I would submit poetry for publication every day. I would catch up on quality family time, organize my closet, spring clean my house…all in a Mary Poppins sort of way.
With our world home-bound in mandated isolation, why not?
Time is a trickster, giving any Anansi or Coyote story a run for its money. I haven’t accomplished even a quarter of my ramblings above. That is to say, not without effort. I have put my heart into many desired tasks. Unfortunately, I fall into bed each night with hardly a chip in my to-do list.
Enough! Yesterday I decided, I’m okay with that.
Our world has never dealt with a virus like this…well at this scale and in my lifetime. The life I know to be normal has vanished. Therefore, the thought of my ability to carry on as per usual seems unreasonable at the very least. It’s time to give myself grace.
There’s an emotional piece to this lock-down. It’s taking a toll after two months, especially with no dawn of morning on the horizon. I know our world will come through, I just don’t know when…or how…or in what shape I might be in on the other side.
I find it challenging enough controlling my schedule in a less-than-perfect regular world, so setting myself up to control anything in a clearly out-of-control world, filled with Corona Virus, is ridiculous. Acknowledging this reality has helped settle my thoughts.
It may feel like I have extra time, because I’m at home every day, all day long. But, for me, I am still working (gratefully), even though the other half of my family is not. For me, I am still writing (thankfully), even if I can’t seem to finish my hefty self-set goals. For me, my family is well (so far), though my heart goes out to the ones who are suffering. But surviving through the anxiety and wonder and worry about the what-if’s is all-consuming. And all-consuming is too heavy to carry around.
Instead, I am challenging myself to celebrate the tiny tasks done well.
I am taking each day as it comes.
I am remembering to add in patience and self-care.
It seems like time is abundant in this COVID-19 lock-down, but this virus is a scary thing in itself. Instead of putting more pressure on myself to utilize every possible minute of the day, it’s time for a gentler approach. That is number one on my to-do list now.
Happy Writing (because even when you give yourself grace, you’re still writing),
Celaine Charles, May 3, 2020
https://www.yourquote.in/amit-rao-qg09/quotes/do-few-things-do-them-exceptionally-well-pqh26 (Do a few things well, quote)
https://fineartamerica.com/featured/hands-of-time-andrew-judd.html (art, Hands of Time by Andrew Judd)
Categories: Thoughts on writing...
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